i will never coherently bang her
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
thats it. im teaching my cat how to use a fire alarm
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
You know you've got awesome issues when the main deciding factor of whether or not to cut your nails depends on nacho consumption in the near future
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
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