Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
Dude there's ten thousand dollars worth of damage to the kids house and three thousand in stolen property and his dog is missing he is pissed
If I give him back his dog do you think he'll invite me to the next party
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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