Turns out I'm like the Wayne Gretzky of hiding cum. Who knew?
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
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Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
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Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
He said I taste like cake. Like funfetti. So I feel like if he doesn't come back for that he's just dumb
if he ever tells me he loves me when we are sober, i am a goner. just fyi.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you