i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Her family was right next to mine during christmas eve mass. Between the terrifying glares and her trying to set my sleeve on fire during the candle part I am VERY sure she knows im fucking her ex...
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
They need 20 oz Capri suns with liquor. Douches need to grow up with their clients
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
If you bet guys that you can drink them under the table they will pay for your drinks all night until they pass out. I have this down to a science that I think even my dad would appreciate.
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
