you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
well since you're still married, you will be paying for my abortion right?
I was tripping so hard I was disappointed when I pulled back the shower curtain and shrek wasn't standing there
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
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