My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
You told me you were pretty sure you were god because you knew everything about everyone.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
How did it go last night?
Woke up head half shaved and a burrito? So good and bad?
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
We should leave before they realize I dumped a bowl of Fritos in your bag just in case I got hungry
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
