How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
My mascara kind of smells like tequila to me...Is this my body crying for help or asking for a shot?
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
woke up hungover this morning lying in a water raft covered in water.. i dont know if i should consider this good or bad
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