So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
She gave me what I will now dub a "hurricane sandy". Loud, wet and sloppy BJ that made me want to stay home and complain about shit on the Internet
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
So not only did I get laid today but I also left with a 42” tv lol
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
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