Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
You hit on my mom and then passed out in the kiddie pool.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
CUT OFF ALL YOUR HAIR COME ON MAN LET'S DO THIS
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
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