as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
I don't know how to say this, but I think you're a fucking bitch and the sooner you die I'll be happier.
Sorry- wrong number! :)
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
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