Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
You can come over, sure. But I'll be watching college hockey during the blow job.
Found your pants. They were stuffed in the tank of the toilet.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Randomize
