When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's a good cause. For your vagina.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
They're having lesbian sex while I play super mario world. I hope they like the music
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Wanted to let you know I hooked up with your brother.
i thought he was gay wtf
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