Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
whenever he tweets that he wants to get blackout it's like a neon sign for "i want to bang you tonight"
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
Randomize
