I want to stick my p in your. b.
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
we broke up because he couldn't handle the fact that i've slept with more girls than he has. also, i've slept with the girl he's seeing now.
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
i only stock magnum condoms so if the guy i bring home doesn't fit in them he only gets to eat me out. no exceptions.
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
Randomize
