Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
She just sent me videos of her blowing my little bro and my best friend... worst. ex. ever.
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
The highlight of your blackout was when you drunk showered with the garden hose and emailed your boss your vacation requests for the next year.
I am naked in a blanket sprawled on my bed eating a pastry. This is all I want out of life. Ever.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Randomize
