tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
i really wanted you to get laid last night and i didnt think you were going to. so i posted porn on your facebook.it made sense at 3am
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
Yeah well I just had an orgasm on my bathroom floor so there's a first for everything I guess
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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