In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Also, there's the possibility of falling 5 feet to your death to make it more exciting
In which case I will yell FIVE SECOND RULE and continue to slam you
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Drunk sex on a hardwood floor is never ever a good idea. Lesson learned.
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
Randomize
