she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
mmm whisky
reminds me of losing my job
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
I've never had sex with me but I assume there are worse ways to be woken up.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
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