I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
I was eating pickles straight from a jar, contemplating doing something productive. What did I miss?
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
