I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was focused on more important things... like standing, and not spilling my beer
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Your friend, the one I told I would brush his teeth with my tongue, what's his name again?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Randomize