I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
You said "It's ok guys, I know I'm not really a turtle" and then tried walking on the lake.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
she pointed to my dick and said you are going to save the world
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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