how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
i don't even know why we got arrested this time. i think the cops just like our company at this point
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
Seriously, I woke you up with tacos, I think I deserve the best girlfriend ever award
God I miss you. I want to fuck your face... Then do all the girly cuddly shit too.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Pants are for mortals
Afterwards he face timed like four of his friends screaming he banged the hot intern.
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
I'm a history major and he's the descendant of TWO presidents. Did you really think I wasn't going to sleep with him?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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