I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my fridge, one on my face, and a trail of it leading to my bedroom, and sauce all in my bed, and I have no idea what the fuck i ate.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
