Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Love me.
GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.
Just for one nugget?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
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