Non-Jews are for practice
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.