We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
You are two creepy Justin Bieber quotes away from me not talking to you for the rest of the day
If I had a pelvic thrust emoticon, I would use it
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
Now: to brush my teeth, put on my grandma slippers and earplugs, masturbate to 50 Shades and then PTFO
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
In the middle of pounding my asshole he stopped and said, "do you want to get breakfast after this?"
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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