my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
i dont even know how to be here
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
at least its a cool name to shout when he's balls deep in you later
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
