Just had a girl agree to give me a blowjob in exchange for wearing my jacket during class. Talk about successful negotiations. Best day of my life
My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
He wants me to have his first child. So that makes four gay men that've called dibs on my eggs.
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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