Life lesson: if you fart while talking to a girl outside, the smell does not dissipate, it just lingers around mocking you
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
He came up to me muttering about the pills on the bathroom floor... I found him an hour and a half later trying to take naked photos of himself with an alarm clock...
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Note to self: Calvin Klein's are not safe to shit in.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
COME AND FUCKING GET ME I AM IN SOME SORT OF JUNKYARD!!!
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
Randomize
