You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
I've only been here for an hour and I've already made 6 babies cry.
Happy Birthday
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I just don't know the best way to tell him I think I saw him in a porn. I mean I got off to it, isn't there some level of awkwardness there?
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
