I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
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