Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
can i bring anything?
Any of the following: Sex doll, side dish, fruits/vegetables that look like dildos, beer
is there a theme i should know about?
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
It's taking all of my will power not to chug this margarita. This must be the life of an adult...
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
