so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Randomize
