while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Hon, I found you crying into a bathrobe in the back of a closet with a broken shoerack.
i've created a new STD.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
