Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
Just checked my recent transactions online. Between the hours of 1 and 3am on September 30th, I went to 7/11 4 times. Unacceptable.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
As a general rule, drunkenness and gymnastics do not mix.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
