what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
He had Jail Releases phone number programed into speed dial on his phone.
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Sex was followed by homemade breadsticks. I waited till after the breadsticks were gone to tell her i had a gf.
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
