So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
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I can't be held responsible for my own vagina. Let's just be honest here.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
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We did hand stand push-ups while beer bonging. Its now a thing
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I can't trust your balls anymore.
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