i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
I thought it couldn't get worse until she said "Nipple hair"
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Hey.... can you explain to me why when I woke up this morning my cell phone background had been changed to me getting a piggy back ride from a drag queen?
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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