How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
I'll never forget how blunt of a wingman you were. "Excuse me, my friend wants to makeout with someone"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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