Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
So I stole cocaine from one of my Tinder hookups
And that is the most millennial sentence I've ever said
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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