i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
somethin' about having sex in my parents bed makes me feel like l'm finally an adult.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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