Hey sorry for feelin' up your date. Sadly, this is a mass txt.
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Sooo, drunk me had the sense of mind to write down everything that happened last night.....I bet you thought you'd get away with what you did to my parrot.
oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Brilliant thought; pill pong.
What could go wrong?
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
Did you cry?
I don't think so. I definitely lost my cool though
Yeah i think jesus would lose his cool in that situation
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
all i know is that i woke up at 12:00 am in a shower with egg shell in my hair. i am 90% sure you are responsible.
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