Define "chronic" masturbator.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
He sent me a video of himself jacking off. I am not kidding.
WTF??? Isn't he married??
Yeah but his wife is at a birthday party and I guess he's bored. LOL
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
duddde i wasn't even home last night and someone elses clothes are on my floor and there glow sticks everywhere?!
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
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