Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
How bad was it?
Stopped drinking Sunday, hungover on Tuesday bad.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
You think your roommate is bad? The guy they paired me with is such a nerd, his very presence at a party blocks every cock in the room.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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