...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
my phone needs a breathalizer
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
Every man needs a table where they can sit and reflect on the successful penile conquests of the day.
Monday is now my bitch. I just did 20 naked push ups on the bar for $20
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
