Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Woke up with two different flip flops on sum burnt at the beach. Who are these French kids plz come back
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Randomize
