I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
I really hope you are not drunk feeding a raccoon.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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