Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
She's the barista slut.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sorry I didn't get you anything for your birthday
It's just you didn't get me the fucking bear suit last year
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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