Texts From Last Night

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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!

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  (405): You can't have hate sex in a hallway!! http://tfl.nu/3bhn
  Replies (22) Good night (3912) Bad night (575)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.

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  (678): Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action. http://tfl.nu/m88z
  Replies (26) Good night (5537) Bad night (1702)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen?

  (713): View more from Texas

  lets deal with that after we figure out where i am

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  (832): why is there a handicap sign in the bathtub and an exit sign in the kitchen? (713): lets deal with that after we figure out where i am http://tfl.nu/0phs
  Replies (21) Good night (10967) Bad night (1161)
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  (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.

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  (724): I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more. http://tfl.nu/i8a4
  Replies (13) Good night (3182) Bad night (1171)
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.

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  (678): I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you. http://tfl.nu/ocnt
  Replies (1) Good night (1957) Bad night (765)
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  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.

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  (215): And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird. http://tfl.nu/shu7
  Replies (5) Good night (924) Bad night (2357)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck

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  (773): They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck http://tfl.nu/dsuf
  Replies (8) Good night (2009) Bad night (744)
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  (949): View more from California

  So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?

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  (949): So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam? http://tfl.nu/9cgv
  Replies (18) Good night (2837) Bad night (1059)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.

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  (651): Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it. http://tfl.nu/j2gr
  Replies (5) Good night (1457) Bad night (473)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness

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  (610): I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness http://tfl.nu/gzkv
  Replies (6) Good night (1427) Bad night (583)
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  (510): View more from California

  I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.

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  (510): I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English. http://tfl.nu/sei7
  Replies (4) Good night (1380) Bad night (429)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow

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  (303): I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow http://tfl.nu/wseu
  Replies (2) Good night (1014) Bad night (282)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.

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  (613): Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control. http://tfl.nu/w1lp
  Replies (4) Good night (1803) Bad night (297)
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  (309): View more from Illinois

  Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety?

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  (309): Why is it that when I sustain a serious injury people are more concerned with my level of inebriation than my personal safety? http://tfl.nu/ikg5
  Replies (2) Good night (578) Bad night (267)
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  (361): View more from Texas

  His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night

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  (361): His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night http://tfl.nu/4mza
  Replies (1) Good night (223) Bad night (593)

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