So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
I always feel awkward when im sitting at home watching the price is right and the fat contestant get the gym equipment.
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.