get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
