Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...

(716): View more from New York

what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?

(617): View more from Massachusetts

self-loathing.

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(617): omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night... (716): what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk? (617): self-loathing. http://tfl.nu/qojo

Replies (7) Good night (1208) Bad night (3238)
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(480): View more from Arizona

I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen.

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(480): I finally got laid.. you said it wouldn't happen. http://tfl.nu/7g0m

Replies (51) Good night (9489) Bad night (845)
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(513): View more from Ohio

I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.

(440): View more from Ohio

...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.

(513): View more from Ohio

That was a text you sent me last night.

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(513): I think I'd do Clint Eastwood. (440): ...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now. (513): That was a text you sent me last night. http://tfl.nu/tvw9

Replies (36) Good night (10152) Bad night (1183)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways

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(203): I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways http://tfl.nu/010i

Replies (14) Good night (1348) Bad night (5096)
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(949): View more from California

Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"

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(949): Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick" http://tfl.nu/m9ln

Replies (22) Good night (3904) Bad night (1309)
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(904): View more from Florida

My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones

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(904): My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones http://tfl.nu/lwep

Replies (8) Good night (2971) Bad night (1561)
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(504): View more from Louisiana

Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.

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(504): Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed. http://tfl.nu/fl8o

Replies (12) Good night (4616) Bad night (1040)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads

(1-203): View more from Connecticut

Like Teddy Roosevelt

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(203): I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads (1-203): Like Teddy Roosevelt http://tfl.nu/jrby

Replies (4) Good night (2051) Bad night (794)
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(606): View more from Kentucky

I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.

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(606): I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died. http://tfl.nu/jcdc

Replies (7) Good night (1597) Bad night (1006)
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(516): View more from New York

We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom

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(516): We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom http://tfl.nu/tkh6

Replies (8) Good night (2411) Bad night (757)
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(602): View more from Arizona

I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.

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(602): I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets. http://tfl.nu/wv2q

Replies (10) Good night (1429) Bad night (583)
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(650): View more from California

The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad

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(650): The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad http://tfl.nu/ulr7

Replies (7) Good night (786) Bad night (1217)
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(312): View more from Illinois

I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.

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(312): I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again. http://tfl.nu/hmft

Replies (0) Good night (680) Bad night (364)
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(314): View more from Missouri

Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome

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(314): Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome http://tfl.nu/2lxw

Replies (4) Good night (1016) Bad night (440)
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(904): View more from Florida

Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.

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(904): Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool. http://tfl.nu/cjt9

Replies (1) Good night (304) Bad night (459)

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